When it comes to negotiation, there is an ugly double standard. As women, if we make concessions to further a deal, we're viewed as weak. But if we play hard-ball, we can be seen as overly aggressive - and the strategy backfires. No wonder most women hate negotiating.In Your Own Terms, negotiation expert Yasmin Davidds helps women strike a balance, merging our natural strengths (collaboration, relationship building, listening) with a firm grasp of established tactics. Guidelines, stories, and exercises illuminate the psychology of negotiation and reveal how women can:
Control how they are perceived
Eliminate self-sabotaging beliefs and behaviors
Discover their personal negotiation style
Envision the ideal outcome and map backwards
Understand an opponent's approach and adjust theirs in response
Deploy persuasion and redirection tactics
Set the bar high and negotiate to get there. With this empowering book, women learn the skills to win on their own terms - and open doors they never knew were shut.
Yasmin Davidds, PSY.D., is founder and CEO of the Women's Institute of Negotiation (WIN) and the Latina Global Executive Leadership Program. She has trained thousands of corporate leaders across the globe. Ann Bidou is a writer and the coauthor of several books.
CONTENTS Acknowledgments xi Part 1: Own Your Game Chapter 1: Empower Yourself 3 Chapter 2: Your Style: Changes You Need to Make When Negotiating with Men or Women 16 Chapter 3: How Not to Sabotage Your Negotiating Power 30 Chapter 4: The Four Stages of Negotiation 41 Chapter 5: Determine Which Negotiation Style Is Right for You 53 Chapter 6: Manage Negotiations with the "Backwards Mapping" Technique 69 Part 2: Build Leverage with Your Negotiation Toolbox Chapter 7: Offensive Maneuvers and How to Counter Them 85 Chapter 8: Power Moves for Handling Difficult People 100 Chapter 9: Communication Strategies That Create a Level Playing Field 112 Chapter 10: Fail-Proof Persuasion Tactics 126 Chapter 11: The Art of the Redirect: Managing Destabilizing Moves 141 Part 3: Winning Game Plans: Negotiating with Power and Grace Chapter 12: Gender Intelligence and Negotiation 157 Chapter 13: How, When, and Why to Make Concessions 170 Chapter 14: Negotiating with the "Big Boys" 180 Chapter 15: Negotiate Your Way to Leadership Success 189 Chapter 16: The Real Test: Your Salary Negotiation 199 Chapter 17: Put Your Negotiation Skills to Work 209 Chapter 18: View from the Trenches: Lessons for Women as Leaders and Negotiators 221 Appendix 1-Language of Negotiation 241 Appendix II-Personal and Professional Checklist for Complex Negotiations 245 Notes 247 Resources 251 Index 255